Merjeo by Charlie

Funny, Wild, Crazy Stories

Home » 2014 » January

Proposed New Rule Change for the NBA

Late in the second half of the NBA Basketball game between the Oklahoma City Thunder and the Brooklyn Nets, the Thunder had a commanding lead. The lead was 26 at one point. The announcers recommended that there be a rule change.

If a Player makes a shot from half court, the game is automatically tied.

This would never work. Too many players are good at shooting from half court. I have a better suggestion that would be more of a challenge, and make the game more interesting.

If the ball goes into the basket off another Player’s head, the team is awarded 25 points.

Bill Clinton’s Number Retired at the University of Arkansas

bill-clintonBill Clinton, former President, attended the NBA Basketball game between the Oklahoma City Thunder and the Brooklyn Nets on Friday evening, January 31. He was interviewed during the second half of the game.

Mr. Clinton was asked about his number being retired at the University of Arkansas. The interviewer questioned him about this, since Bill Clinton never played basketball for the Arkansas Razorbacks.

Bill Clinton, the Honorary “Sixth Man”

Clinton responded. His story was, Arkansas recently had a ceremony to commemorate the twentieth anniversary of the Arkansas Razorbacks winning the NCAA Basketball National Championship. During this ceremony, Arkansas retired Bill Clinton’s number. During the season, twenty years ago, the Arkansas Razorbacks named Bill Clinton as the honorary sixth man, and gave him number 42, representing the fact that he was the 42nd President of the United States.

Come to think of it, do you ever remember any athlete in any sport, professional or college, wearing number 42 within the last several years?

This is very surprising. I thought the number, 42, was permanently retired from all of sports, to honor Jackie Robinson as being the first African American baseball player.

Image, Executive Office of the President of the United States. Image is in the public domain.

Animal Rescue – Can They Be Trusted to Save an Animal?

I am an animal lover. I love dogs. There is no question, a dog is the best friend you can possibly have. It will love you, no matter what.

I have two Boston Terriers that I love more then life itself. The brown one is Holly Ann. The black one is Dixie Rose. They don’t bite, but they will lick you to death.

boston terrier

Yesterday morning, I was taking them outside to do their business. It was freezing outside. Yesterday was by far the coldest day of the year so far. A neighbor’s dog was outside my house. I don’t know who the owner of the dog is, but I have seen this dog many times before. He is a very friendly fellow. All he wants is to be loved by someone. He is just an ordinary neighborhood dog, because he has hung around my house many times. I assume that he usually goes home when he is ready.

Because of the frigid weather, I was concerned, so I called my Vet and asked him what to do to get this fellow out of the cold weather. He suggested calling the nearest Animal Rescue service, and gave me the telephone number.

I called them, and said that I was concerned about this dog. The owner had abandoned him. They said that they could not come take the dog until the next day. I said, “TAKE? I don’t want you to take the dog. I just want you to find out if he has a microchip, and then, talk some sense into the dog’s owner. NO GOOD.”

Then, I asked, “If you do, in fact, take him and get him to safety, you won’t put the dog to sleep, will you?” The girl on the other end of the line said, “There is no guarantee. If someone does not claim the dog after 7 days, we probably will.” This really pissed me off. My response to this was:

Oh, HELL NO ! I’ll take care of this fellow myself !

The lady went on to say, “Sir, there is nothing else we can do. We can’t just keep dogs here forever.” Then I asked her:

How would the owner of this dog like it if you put him to sleep instead of the dog?

The dog spent the remainder of the day in my closed garage, under a blanket.

In closing, I want to share something else with you about my love for doga. About five years ago, when Michael Vick was sentenced to prison for killing dogs, someone asked me the following question:

Why is Michael Vick going to prison for killing dogs, while Ray Lewis did not go to prison for killing a person?

My opinion, and my answer to this question was simple:

Because Dogs are Better than People. A Person Will Hurt You for No Reason, but a Dog Will Only if He is Threatened.

Bernie Madoff Recovering – What Are His Victims Saying?

bernie-madoffBernie Madoff, the mastermind behind the White Collar Crime of the Century, is recovering from a heart attack. At the same time, he is battling kidney cancer.

No one deserves to die, not even the perpetrator of the famous Ponzi scheme. If he does, he may be judged by a power far greater than the U.S. Justice Department. I surely hope that someone up there, or, down there, whichever the case may be, will have mercy on him.

If he does survive his recent health setbacks, he is not going to be attending any parties, or teeing of on the golf course at 8:00 AM any time in the near future. So, Bernie Madoff is screwed any way you look at it. Many of his victims might want him to live so he can remain behind bars. If he dies, he will not be in prison anymore. But this is kind of getting released from prison THE HARD WAY.

What Do the Victims of Bernie Madoff Think?

I was not one of the victims of Bernie Madoff, so I can’t answer this.  But consider this. No one had a gun held to their head forcing them to give him the money. All Bernie did was turn on the natural charm, and let nature take its course.

This couldn’t happen to a nicer fellow.

Some of his pigeons may blame themselves for their stupidity, but I wouldn’t count on it. It would not come as a surprise if many of them are saying:

“I hope the next words spoken to Mr. Madoff are, ‘Welcome to Hell, Bernie'”

 

Image: United States Department of Justicein the public domain

Strange Encounter with a Zoosk Member

transvestiteI’m sure many of you are familiar with the Zoosk app on Facebook. It is an online dating website that can be downloaded from your Facebook account.

Anyway, I received a message from a Zoosk member a few days ago, saying that she thought I was cute, and she wanted to chat with me. I took a good look at her profile, and noticed that she had six pictures downloaded.

As I took a closer look, I noticed that SHE was actually a HE. Unless my imagination ran away with me, I have no doubt that this person was either a man dressed up as a woman, or a transvestite.