Merjeo by Charlie

Funny, Wild, Crazy Stories

Home » 2014 » August

How Did Lou Gehrig Die?

lou-gehrig

A few weeks ago, I was watching an old movie with a friend on TCM. The movie was, The Pride of the Yankees, starring Gary Cooper. This movie portrayed the life of one of the greatest baseball players of all time, Lou Gehrig.

When Gary Cooper made the famous speech about being the . . .luckiest man on the face of the earth. . ., my friend asked me, “How did he die?” My answer to her question was, “He died from Lou Gehrig’s Disease.”

Source: ALS ASSOCIATION

Kids Learn Bribery At An Early Age

bribery

I have a little nephew who is almost two years old. Ever since this kid was born, he has never liked me. I don’t know why, but he screamed at the top of his lungs every time he saw me. I don’t think he was afraid of me. He just didn’t like me.

One day, while the whole family was gathered together, I decided to do an experiment. When I saw him, I gave him a giant Hershey’s Chocolate Bar.

Now, every time he gets his hands on my brother’s smart phone, he calls me and says, “Hey Charlie!”

All of a sudden, he is crazy about me. Do you think this kid has a future in politics?

Source: No source. No link. This really happened.

Kevin Love And the New BIG THREE

kevin-love

There is a new BIG THREE. It is no longer in Miami. It is in Cleveland.

With Kevin Love joining LeBron James and Kyrie Irving, there is a new power in the East. All the Cavs need to do now is find another BirdMan, and it will be like old times to LeBron.

Source: SB NATION

Mariah Carey & Nick Cannon – Do They Want to Save It

mariah-carey-nick-cannon
Is the marriage worth saving for Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon?

Mariah does not want a marriage counselor. She is afraid it would get out that the marriage was in trouble. Well, darling, let me enlighten you. It’s already out. You and Nick have been the hottest searches on Google this week.

  • Mariah and Nick are both heart broken.
  • Mariah and Nick still love each other.
  • Mariah does not think a counselor would understand their marriage.
  • Mariah is playing mental games with Nick.
  • Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon will live by B S and will be eventually done in by B S.

Face it. All of this is B S. Where there’s B S, there’s more B S. B S is what got the marriage in trouble.

Do Mariah and Nick want more B S?

There are two choices. Save the marriage, and there will be more B S. End the marriage, and,

NO MORE B S.

Source: Hollywood Life

GOP Raises Hell With President Obama

ISIS

 

The GOP is pissed off at President Obama for vacationing during the ISIS Terrorist crisis. If confronted with this, the President would probably say, “I think better when I’m on the golf course.”

Source: CBS NEWS

Taylor Swift Realizes She’s a Feminist

taylor-swift

 

A feminist is defined by Merriam-Webster as one who believes that men and women should have equal rights and opportunities. Is this why Taylor Swift considers herself to be a feminist?

I have always believed this, and I am a man. Does this make me a feminist? Or, am I a masculinist?

I can also say that I support homosexuality, but I’ll be damned if I’m going to be one.

Source: Time

Taylor Swift Pisses Off Black Women of America

taylor-swift

Shake it Off

Taylor Swift is in hot water. They are mad at her because they think she is “Portraying Black Stereotypes”. But they are really mad at her because she can dance. Women don’t like competition. She has more moves than ex-lax.

Source: The Huffington Post

Tennessee Death Row Inmates Sue

electric-chair

 

Ban the ELECTRIC CHAIR

The Electric Chair is cruel and unusual punishment. But, is lethal injection gentle and usual punishment?

The death row inmates would rather be drugged to death instead of electrocuted. I assume these guys are tough, and are not afraid to die. Why should it matter to them how they die. Ten minutes later, they will not know the difference anyway.

When you’re dead, you’re dead.

Source: NBC NEWS

Nicki Minaj’s Butt Overtakes Miley Cyrus’ Butt

NickiMinaj

Anaconda, aka, YouTube Viewers sets all time record. Nicki Minaj’s butt did it. Her butt has been a National Inspiration. The word is, Reader’s Digest is going to publish an article entitled, “I am Nicki Minaj’s BUTT.”

Source: HappyPlace

How Do You Handle Rejection?

pabst-bllue-ribbon-beer

 

 

This is the way I handle rejection. First I go the the store and buy a case of Pabst Blue Ribbon Beer. Second, I download as many Carrie Underwood and Nickelback songs as I possibly can. Third, I start listening to the music with headphones, with the volume turned up full blast. Finally, I keep drinking one beer after another until everything is just one bug BLUR.

Source: BuzzFeed

James Foley Beheading Video Could Be Fake

Warning – ISIS beheading of American James Foley might contain content that is not suitable for all ages.

First and foremost, I hope the video is a fake. It bothers me to think that someone would brutally murder someone like this in cold blood.

I’ve watched the unedited version several times, and analyzed it. There are a number of things that seem very suspicious. These leads me to believe that this video is a phony.

  • The video looks like it was made on a Hollywood Set. For all we know, it could have been made in Hollywood, but I wouldn’t go that far.
  • The background appears to be a picture.
  • The wind is blowing very strong on Foley’s clothing. But, nothing in the background appears to me moving. The grassy areas, the sand and the clouds appear to be part of a picture.
  • A strong wind seems to be blowing Foley’s clothing . However, the clothing worn by the masked man in black is not blowing as strong. This leads me to believe that a fan may have been facing directly at the prisoner identified as James Foley.
  • If you look closely at the shadows by the two men in the video, it looks as if there could have been a stage light shining on them.
  • When the masked man finished talking, and was about to behead Foley, the video is temporarily stopped as the knife seems to lodge into his neck. If the ISIS terrorist really wanted to shake up the American public and rub it in, every brutal detail would have been shown in the video. This leads to three important questions: Why was the video stopped?Did the execution really take place?; and, Was the masked man in black holding a real knife?
  • The apparent knife the masked man is holding is not much larger than a paring knife. If the ISIS terrorist was about to behead someone, he probably would have used a sword, or a much larger knife.
  • Foley did not make a sound. When Nick Berg was beheaded in May, 2004, he screamed at the top of his lungs as the knife was going into his neck. Also, recall in the Nick Berg video that the entire brutal execution was shown.

If you watch the video again, you can form your own opinion.

I Was Victim Of A Citizens Arrest

The gentleman who arrested me had to be an Andy Griffith fan

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Corporate America Strikes Again in Moody AL

Big Coporate Giant Screws Not So Big Corporate Giant

food-giantWhen Corporate America decided it wanted to be the only game in town, they ran the Mom and Pop businesses away. Now, they want to run away all businesses that can give them the slightest bit of competition.

I wouldn’t exactly call Food Giant a Mom and Pop Store. But I do refer to Publix as a Corporate Bully. They like to flex their muscles like an impotent beach boy at the first sign of competition. Publix is scared to death of Food Giant. On the other hand, Food Giant is not intimidated by Publix. In the City of Moody, Alabama, Food Giant would beat Publix, hands down, in areas from prices to customer service. But this is not the way the City of Moody wants it, by special request from the Publix front office.

The Moody City Council met on Thrusday evening to decide the fate of the long time neighborhood grocery store that has been a model to the Moody community for many years. Present at the meeting were, Director of Food Giant stores Jay Mitchell of Mitchell Grocery Corp., and Moody Food Giant store manager Randy Coker. Also present were many of the 85 plus employees of the store, who had given their best and their loyalty to Jay and Randy over the many years. Jay indicated at the meeting that Food Giant is not afraid of competition from anyone. In fact, the Moody Food Giant is the only store that has challenged, one on one, the largest Corporate Giant of them all – WalMart. Randy stated that Food Giant has been a very important part of the Moody community over the years.

The conclusion of the Moody City Council was to close Food Giant and demolish the building and shopping center to make way for the other guys who, in their minds, will bring more revenue into this small community. This could happen within the next two to three months. This means that many of the Food Giant employees will lose their jobs. This is a tragedy, because the Food Giant Employees and the Moody community are like a family However, I can’t see this happening to all of them. Randy is, undoubtedly, one of the best store managers around. Food Giant also has the best pastry chef and cake decorator in the country.

If you want to think in terms of gratitude, consider the situation that brought Food Giant to Moody in the first place. Winn Dixie once occupied the space that is now Food Giant. When Winn Dixie closed, the City of Moody practically begged Food Giant to bail them out. They did just that. Now, the reaction is “Thanks, but we don’t need you anymore.”

The Winner and the Loser

As you drive east on Interstate 20, just out of Birmingham, and approach Exit 144, Moody is on the left and Leeds is on the right. Likewise, Food Giant is on the left and Wal-Mart is on the right. With the vacant lot, and no Food Giant for at least the next two years, Moody customers will go to Wal-Mart. The result is, lost sales tax revenue for Moody, and more for Leeds.

What happens if and when Publix decides to open a store in Moody? Because of their high prices and off the wall selection of items, the down-to-earth people of Moody will want no part of that. The result will be, more business for Wal-Mart and Leeds, and less business for Publix and Moody.

The real winner is Wal-Mart. The loser is the City of Moody. Publix is just a comic figure in all of this drama.

Finally, suppose Publix double crosses the City of Moody and decides not to open a store there.

They’ve done it before. They’ll do it again. What Corporate America wants, Corporate America Gets.

food-giant

The Catfish Are Really Biting This Year

I wish they were biting this good at the river. I would go fishing everyday. Unfortunately, this is not the river. This is the World Wide Web. And this little catfish supposedly lives in Nigeria.

This catfish was a little different from Stacy. She did not beat around the bush. She got right to the point. The only similarity was, her name rhymed. This girl’s name was Tracy.

This Catfish Was Not As Greedy

This one started with an email. She said that she was from Maryland, living in Nigeria, and looking to a man to settle down with. Then, she wanted to know my most embarrassing moment. And, of course, she sent me the pictures that are posted below.

The next day, I received a text message asking me to send her $2,000 so she could come be with me. I answered her text message by saying, “I’m turning your pictures over to the Justice Department tomorrow. They will come to Nigeria and track you down.” I didn’t really mean this because I am not a snitch. I just wanted to get a reaction, and a reaction, I GOT. Poor Tracy answered by saying, “CATCH ME IF YOU CAN.”

Here Are Pictures of Cute Little Tracy

online-catfish

online-catfish

online-catfish
My Thoughts on These Pictures of Dear Little Tracy

This time, I believe they are pictures of the same girl. However, I am still not convinced that my little Tracy is a girl. These don’t exactly look like glamor shots, but they could have been taken from someone’s social media profile.

Tracy, if these pictures are really you, don’t even think about getting angry with me for posting them. You have you own problem. Before Eric Holder gets finished, he’s going to turn you every way but loose.

Finally, if you are the young girl in these pictures, your name is not Tracy, and you are not in Nigeria, you’d better call your lawyer. Someone has stolen your identity.

You Girls Just Keep  On Trying

This is about the fiftieth time a catfish has tried to fin me within the last year. I usually ignore it. It very seldom goes as far as this, or the one with Stacy. Merjeo is part of an online conglomerate that consists of several respectable websites. As the owner of this conglomerate, I want to clarify that I do not like online scams, and online catfish.

If you email me, send me pictures and then ask me for money, I will post your pictures on Merjeo.

I’m not asking you not to do it. Take your best shot at me. By all means, send me the pictures and try to scam me. This will give me some more good stuff to post. You may help me make a career of this.

A Catfish Tried to Sting Me

How an Online Catfish Tried to Scam Me

I’m not going to waste my time, or yours, telling you how to spot an online catfish – an online shyster who tries to get money from you. If you want to know this, just Google it, or go to Dr. Phil.

email-catfish

 

Almost a year ago, I received several emails from, I think,  a girl from a social media site. She (or he) claimed her name was Stacy. Poor Stacey was looking for a soul mate and that one true love. She said she was in Singapore trying to settle her late Father’s million dollar estate.

She sent me an email everyday for a week, telling me how madly in love with me she was, and how she could not wait to be in my arms.  I just ignored them. I had a pretty good idea what she was up to. So, I was just sitting back waiting for her to drop the bomb. And she did just that. As you can see in the email, she asked me to send her $9,000. That’s when I decided to respond. I sent her a email saying that I could not help her, and the result was obvious – I never heard from her (or him) again.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Here Are the Pictures My Darling Little Catfish Sent Me

online-catfish

online-catfish

online-catfish

This is What I Think About These Pictures

These pictures could be glamor photos. They could have been taken from someone’s social media profile, or another website. This also leads me to believe that the person who tried to scam me may not even be a girl.

Are all three of these pictures the same girl? I have my doubts.

Stacey, if these pictures are really you, don’t even think about getting pissed at me for posting them. You have bigger fish to fry.

Finally, if you are the young girl in these pictures, your name is not Stacey, you are not in Singapore, and you are not the heir to a million dollar estate, you’d better do something fast. Someone has stolen your identity.