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Good Bye – Snoop Dogg !

snoop-dogg

Snoop Dogg says he’s leaving the Country because he hates President Trump

That’s a cop out.

I could have said I was leaving the country when Obama was President, but I didn’t. Under the circumstances, I had a better reason to leave than this character. What makes this guy so damn special?

The way I see it, that’s one less pothead. Yes indeedy! Trump really is making America great again!

What’s taking so long Snoop Dogg! Get your a$$ out!

I remember this old School Desk, and so does my ass

school-deskThis is the old school desk that was in full bloom when I was in grammar school.

I remember it like it was yesterday.

I went to grammar school before the authorities banned teachers from hitting kids in schools. Also, I was in grammar school when the nuns were in rare form.

If you’ve heard all of the horror stories about the nuns being the worst bitches, let me assure you, they are all true.

What I remember most about this school desk was, having a hard time sitting down in the hard seat. This was because the nuns, . . .

beat my ass just about every day!

But I didn’t take it personal. The nuns treated us all the same, . . .

Like Dogs!

Old Super Bowl commercial – Not quite $5 million for 30 seconds

old-super-bowl-commercialDo you remember this old Super Bowl Commercial?

This 1979 Coke commercial featured Mean Joe Greene, the baddest defensive lineman from the Pittsburgh Steelers’ dynasty.

2 Facts about this old Mean Joe Green Super Bowl Commercial

First, the cost of this commercial was $723,000 for a 30 second spot. Inflation has definitely hit the Super Bowl. A 30 second spot for Sunday’s Super Bowl was $5 million.

Second, this commercial took 3 days to make. Joe Greene ended up drinking 18 bottles of Coke. This was eighteen 16 oz. bottles of Coke, or the equivalent of 24 cans — two refrigerator 12-packs — of canned Coke.

No wonder he was limping to the locker room!

 

The first time you flew in an airplane, where did you go?

airplane

If you ask 100 people this question, over half would say, . . .

To the Bathroom!

Supermarket quirk

supermarketWhen I’m at the supermarket and getting something, . . .

I always grab the item in the back of the shelf, thinking there is something wrong with the item in the front of the shelf.

I’ve been doing this for years, out of habit.

Then, I started thinking, . . .

“Why do I do this? Is there really something wrong with the items in the front of the shelf?”

 

Why President Trump should change America’s official language

english-language

english-language

english-language

Do you know what this is?

horseradish

 

I’ll give you a hint.

No, it’s not something dirty, even though it looks gross.

You can find it in the produce section at the supermarket. But you’re probably more used to buying it in a jar.

It is very healthy, and it will cure a toothache.

It is something that makes some foods taste better. Women who are pregnant might put it on ice cream.

I kind of like the taste of it.

Just one suggestion:

Don’t bite into it, or it will make your hair stand straight up.

My love / hate relationship with PIE

pieI love pie. Give me chocolate, coconut, apple, lemon – It doesn’t matter. I love all kinds of pie. It’s my all time favorite dessert.

Unfortunately, there is one thing about pie I can’t stand.

Trying to cut that first piece of pie, and getting the first slice out in one piece can be a real pain in the butt. After getting that first piece out, the rest is a piece of cake. Oh! Excuse me! I’m talking about pie. The rest is a piece of pie!

I’ve never been able to accomplish this difficult task.

That’s right! For me, this is a difficult task. And I take my pie seriously.

Can anyone offer any suggestions on how to cut that first piece of pie, and get it out in one piece?


pieMore PIE humor

3.14159265359

Sometimes, I don’t ask for a piece of pie. Instead, I ask for a piece of 3.14.

I know this is old hat, but I couldn’t resist.

How many times do people need a facelift?

faceliftAfter getting a facelift at least 10 times, you’d think someone would look good.

When you have had this much plastic surgery and still look like hell, then it is time to stop!

Decisions . . . Decisions . . . Decisions . . . Life is tough!

decisionsIf given these two choices, which would you do?

Decisions can be Hell!

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