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How to tell someone you care about, ‘You are too fat’

fatIf the fat person is a casual friend

“I wouldn’t exactly say you’re fat. It’s more like thick. I’m not going to lie to you. But I do think you look good and carry yourself very well.”

The response you’ll get is, “Piss on you.”

If the fat person is your lover

“I don’t mind it if you’re a little fat. The way I see it is, there’s just more of you for me to love.”

The response you’ll get is, “That’s so sweet, but, piss on you.”

No matter who the person is you call ‘fat’, your goose is cooked.

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